With more than
30 people competing, over 100 judges' scores and a few tie breakers, it was an extremely tight race as to who the HOTTEST N-philer of 2005 could be.
Needless to say N-Philes has some handsome members, some of which decided to stay out of the race by not posting pictures probably losing them a top spot (Sir Burley Bee) and some who posted many hours after the deadline (Aipotu). But to those who were brave enough to post pics, congratulations - you're all winners, even if 99% of you are technically losers.
The winner gets impossibly wonderful swag from E3, hugged generously by Xavius plus a water bottle from the opening of Nintendo World this year in New York City, NY - plus, of course, the bragging rights for the entire year for being the person voted Hottest by two homos, a straight guy and two females who probably touched themselves at least once to one of your pictures.
Now the rankings:
10)
DARTHKORN - Canadians didn't dominate this year what with Burley Bee's hot ass mysteriously missing, Hilary joining a convent and NekoSim being considered attractive by multiple judges (although one of which was "scared" of the beard), but Darthkorn is a shining example of what a steady diet of Molson's and the Sens will get you: SUPER SEXY HOTNESS.
9)
EL CINICO - A newcomer to N-Philes, El Cinico's blue-haired charms won over the judges with his million dollar smile and the ability to look slightly different in every picture he posts. Can he climb higher on the Stud Ladder by next year? If Cocoa keeps eating the way he does, most probably.
EDIT: Also interesting how he and Deacon share the same hats.
8)
DEACON - Purportedly the owner of N-Philes, Deacon the Impaler knocked El Cinico out of the 8th spot with his impossibly manly stubble and anime-like blue eyes. Interestingly his disallowance of Daisy to post her breast pics undoubtedly cost Daisy her shot at the big time. So Deacon you may be 8th HOTTEST on N-philes, but you probably won't be getting any tonight!
7)
COCONUT - "Exotic", "Bitchy", "Really Gay", "Multi-Racial" - just a few of the adjectives to decribe N-Philes' favorite ex-Mormon HOTTIE, Coconut. Although pushing strong in the beginning, his temp ban seems to have cost him a higher spot, but like coke-head Kate Moss or Xiu Xiu, will controversy help him next year for a higher spot?
6)
BEN THE FANTASTIC - Um.. honestly I don't know a lot about this guy. But he did have an odd array of photos that seemed to change from Urkel to Stephan Urkel and many of the judges added him to the list as a HOTTIE contender. Maybe if he posted more, he would be higher on the list, but it's a big "WTF" for this fantastic Canadian.
5)
OLMER69 - Olmer69 scored well across the board with all the judges - which is impressive considering the single picture he posted in the original thread. Still, Olmer has stud written all over him: He's been hospitalized for back breaking work in a warehouse - he kicked Ice Queen to the curb and is sending all the judges free sunglasse... er.. nothing. HOT HOT HOT!!
4)
CUBICLE - Cubicle is a cool guy. He's Greek, he's laid back, he's funny and for some weird reason holds onto that unibrow like a badge of honor. It didn't stop the judges from voting him 4th hottest N-philer. As one of the judges said, "He sure looks nice shaved." Well who can disagree with that?
o_o; *ahem*
3)
DANYTOCA - "Who knew he was so hot?" - Anonymous judge. Yes, Dany Toca has beat out arguably more popular N-philers as a HOTTIE contender - but what do we know about DanyToca? According to his profile, enjoys videogaming and skateboarding and even though he is associated with Pocketeers, the judges didn't hold it against him. Kudos to DanyToca who is "Mmm-mmm good!"
2)
JOEYJOJOJRSHABADU - It's funny because at least half of the judges used "shocked" to describe the hotness of JoeyJo.. etc - perhaps because his oh-so-sidesplitting antics on N-philes don't correllate to his anime-inspired hairdos and pouty make-out lips? Is it because they had associated his looks with this monkey-bathing avatar? The point is that JoeyJ scored HUGE points with all the judges and will most probably be a victim of sexual assault if ever imprisoned. We love JoeyJoJoJrShabadu! Good luck next year.
1) DEATHDADDY!!!
"It's gotta be the ass." That's what one of our judges says about winner of the 1st Annual Hottest N-philer award - and who can really compete? It's almost obsene the caliber of bootie DD carries around on a daily basis - but I think what swayed the judges is Deathdaddy's borderline crazy personality and ability to invoke awe and seratonin in all n-philers.
He's The Fonz. He's Batman. He's .. Big Bootie Studman.. and we should all shower DD in cookies for this huge win. Kudos to you and to all the people who entered this year. If you'd like to know specifics about how you did, I suppose you can PM me but I won't reveal who the judges were. Just remember: Make it your all-consuming goal to toss Deathdaddy and JoeyJ out of the top spots!
#
#
#
#
#
#
