N-Philes

I love Nintendo. Only Nintendo would take a chance on a game centered around simians in transparent balls rolling their way through labyrinth-ine banana-holding platforms to cross a goal in under a minute. Only Nintendo would allow a game featuring the phrase "magical spell is Ei-Ei Poo" to see the light of day in America. Only Nintendo would not only sanction, but encourage the development of a game centered around a Dr. Bad-Boon stealing a girl named Meemee from the aforementioned group of sphere-enclosed primates, and only Nintendo has a fanbase insane enough to make the game a hit.



Dr. Bad-Boon is the most undeniably evil creation ever to grace the Nintendo GameCube. He lusts after Meemee, Aiai's wife and mother of Baby, enough to justify her monkeynapping. Aiai, hardened in his belief that no man is an island unto himself and that evil will get its just rewards, decides to embark on an epic quest to retrieve Meemee so he can get his hot monkey love on. Baby and Gongon, Aiai's former arch-rival turned best friend, will help on his quest to take back his monkey bride.

What drives a monkey to take such drastic measures? What could possibly addle a brain so? Take a look at this, friends:



See those lips? You can't find a pair like that anywhere else but on Meemee's face. I hesitate to even attempt to describe her visage, as words fail me in attempting to convey its glow. And that skirt...I won't indulge you as to what's under there, but rest assured that Dr. Bad-Boon is justified in wanting to know more. The flowers only complete the package. She's not putting a new one behind her ear for decoration, if you know what I mean. And I think you do.



All in all, if you haven't played Super Monkey Ball 2 yet, you are certainly missing out. The storyline alone is worth a playthrough, and if you're one of those "gamers" who likes "gameplay" and "tight controls" you'll probably enjoy the game too, even though you're a lesser lifeform. Dr. Bad-Boon's evil is certainly enough to pervade the air between you and your television, and it would not be surprising to find you huddled in a corner somewhere in a puddle of your own urine after seeing his haunting countenance on your television screen.